Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Self-defense

My taekwondo dojang has devoted the last couple of classes to a self-defense seminar. They had a couple of handouts especially for us ladies, and I thought this one in particular was worth sharing on the blog. It's as relevant for men to read this as women, particularly the intro and the last paragraph. After all, the best way to prevent assault is for it perpetrators to not try in the first place.


The Little Rapes

The "little rapes" of life are perpetrated by men with basically the same mentality and social attitudes as the men who commit the actual rapes. Little rapes are not social compliments as most women have been led to believe, but rather are committed with the same emotional intent as actual rapes:

  1. to deny the moral integrity and/or self-image of the woman;
  2. to verbally, or with eye contact, use and/or abuse the woman;
  3. to deny the position of that woman as a peer human being.

Little rapes include such situations as (1) the man who comments about your breasts, rear-end, or some other part of your body; (2) the man who stares at you as though he were undressing you; (3) the man who touches your breast. your rear-end, or some part of your body as he speaks to you; (4) the men who make comments about your body, your sexual prowess, your social character, or your plans for the evening as you pass them on the street.

These little rapes should be handled in much the same way as actual rapes, that is, with assertiveness, aggressiveness and emotional control of the situation. Some examples:

  1. To the man who is staring at you: stare at him until he lowers his eyes, or say something like, "Did you lose something?", "Are you writing a book?", "Stop staring at me, you freak".
  2. To the man who touches you as he speaks: forcefully remove his hand, or say something like, "Get your hands off my body" (as loudly as you can), or "When I want you to touch my body, I'll invite you".
  3. To the men who make comments as you pass by on the street: "You should be ashamed of yourself, I'm old enough to be your mother", or "Are you kidding", or "Bug off" (or some curse words of your choice), or sometimes, a very angry look is enough to calm a situation.
  4. To an exhibitionist: "You're disgusting, you filthy pervert", or "Oh, how interesting, you're showing me your penis". Simply acknowledging his display (rather than a response of fear and/or trauma) may avert a prolonged situation.

Males comprise one-half of the human race and many of them are victims of their own environments and social upbringing. Most men, particularly the ones who are involved in our lives can be re-educated to realize the extent and dangers inherent in social rapes. And indeed, these men deserve the process of re-education, for only when that process is complete will our society be a better place in which to live: a place where both men and women have equal standing, as human beings.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Toolkit for Negotiation

Here's a recent New York Times article entitled "A Toolkit for Women Seeking a Raise:"

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/05/15/your-money/15money.html

It's an interesting article because it gives practical solutions to the problem that women and men are treated differently when they negotiate. After all, as the article says, "research shows that [women] are less likely to ask for raises. Even when they do, their requests may be perceived as overly demanding or less agreeable."

Also, "You may be asking yourself, as I did, whether negotiating in ways more favorable for women means that we’re just succumbing to stereotypes — or whether the ends justify the means." I don't think that the article really answers this question that well, but it does present good practical ways to get what you need. Go read the article.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

AASWomen for May 14, 2010

AAS Committee on the Status of Women
Issue of April 26, 2010
eds. Joan Schmelz, Caroline Simpson amp; Michele Montgomery

This week's issues:

1. Reader Response: Rude Students?

2. AASWomen Workplace sexism: Glass ceilings are supported by glass walls

3. Invitation for Nominations for the Fizeau and Michelson Prizes in Interferometry

4. Prize Women

5. This Week's Summary for the Facebook Page: Committee on the Status of Women in Astronomy

6. M. Hildred Blewett Scholarship for Women in Physics

7. Women For Science Working Group Announced

8. APS: Women and Education Programs Administrator

9. How to Submit, Subscribe, or Unsubscribe to AASWOMEN

10. Access to Past Issues of AASWOMEN

May (be a) Post

May has proven to be a very busy month for me, hence the lack of posting. It also isn't helped by the fact that I'm suffering a combination of writer's block and overthinking of topics to post on.

One topic I that's been tumbling about in my mind is the fact that May is Asian-Pacific American History Month, which ought to be important to me personally as an Asian American. I also understand that Asian Americans are under-represented in some fields of science and engineering, notably Astronomy. But talking about this for real would involve me actually looking up statistics and trying to determine how foreign nationals appear in the picture and expounding on the model minority myth and our invisibility in any discussions of race in this country and addressing issues that hard to talk about. Not that talking about Women in Astronomy is necessarily always easy, but I've had practice there.

Instead, I'll point you to some links that I've found particularly interesting lately.

A terrific report by and about women in astrobiology and planetary sciences from AbSciCon

Also, Susan Neibur, editor of the above blog, was recently diagnosed with a recurrence of inflammatory breast cancer, so she could use your support

Dr. Isis explains one of the reasons why I've been suffering from writer's block"

Female Science Professor writes about something that sounds very much like the Annie Jump Cannon Award. Food for thought.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

AASWOMEN for May 7, 2010

AAS Committee on the Status of Women
Issue of May 7, 2010
eds. Joan Schmelz, Caroline Simpson amp; Michele Montgomery

This week's issues:

1. AAS Talk/Poster Policy: A Model for Equality

2. What Can Men Do to Help Women Succeed in Astronomy?

3. America Competes

4. Rude Students

5. Women Scientists Urge Students to Dream Big

***The following positions were taken from WIPHYS***

6. Research Associate, Gravitational Wave Group, Syracuse University

7. Assistant Professor, Department of Physics, Ithaca College

8. How to Submit, Subscribe, or Unsubscribe to AASWOMEN

9. Access to Past Issues of AASWOMEN

AASWOMEN for April 30, 2010

AAS Committee on the Status of Women
Issue of April 30, 2010
eds. Joan Schmelz, Caroline Simpson amp; Michele Montgomery

This week's issues:

1. Harassment: Serial Offenders - Responses

2. NGCP April Webcast: Why So Few? Eight Research Findings

3. Facing Up to Stereotype Threat

4. Who's in Your Astronomy Class?

5. Diversifying the Science Faculty

6. Margaret Geller Awarded NAS Medal

7. 2011 OUSTA Award of the Society for College Science Teachers

8. Graduate, Post-Doctoral, and Senior Researcher Opportunities at National Labs

9. Visiting Assistant Professor, Rowan University

10. How to Submit, Subscribe, or Unsubscribe to AASWOMEN

11. Access to Past Issues of AASWOMEN

AASWOMEN for April 23, 2010

AAS Committee on the Status of Women
Issue of April 23, 2010
eds. Joan Schmelz, Caroline Simpson amp; Michele Montgomery

This week's issues:

1. Harassment: Serial Offenders

2. You Might Be a Senior Woman if . . .

3. AAS Special Session: Addressing Unconscious Bias

4. CSWA Town Hall: Designing a 21st Century Astronomy Career Track

5. AAS Special Session: Mentoring Astronomers

6. Gender Wage Gap in 2010:

7. CSWA Special Session and Town Hall at the Seattle AAS Meeting

8. NGCP April Webcast: Why So Few?

9. How to Submit, Subscribe, or Unsubscribe to AASWOMEN

10. Access to Past Issues of AASWOMEN