tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6374266320411149509.post7693428890585841685..comments2024-03-25T10:22:36.277-04:00Comments on Women In Astronomy: Taking a Mental Health Break from My DissertationAmanpreet Kaurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08734178178113146899noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6374266320411149509.post-85034433617263556592015-12-04T13:52:33.983-05:002015-12-04T13:52:33.983-05:00I had similar issues in the PhD (and after!). I tr...I had similar issues in the PhD (and after!). I tried counseling but we only had free sessions at the school for about once every two weeks for a few months. It was too expensive (money and time wise) for me to seek more help. I was too anxious and depressed to talk with my advisor about the problem. I ended up working from home for a month one November the year before I defended. My advisor never asked or said anything until much later. When I told him I wanted to defend that summer, he brought up that he didn't know if I'd be able to make that timeline because I hadn't worked much that January (shows how much some advisors pay attention! he got the month wrong and I had been working, just not in the office). For me, I continue to power through even after and found it too difficult to confront my advisor about my personal problems. I think a lot of advisors don't want to have these conversations, as they are uncomfortable and not in their job description. It is so brave of you, Nicole and Mia, to openly discuss these problems! I bet that they are far more common, but most of us suffer in silence.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6374266320411149509.post-12284793397390722812015-12-03T17:55:40.786-05:002015-12-03T17:55:40.786-05:00good post. personally i found alcohol works extre...good post. personally i found alcohol works extremely well. also, compared to other drugs, its long and short term effects are well understood.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6374266320411149509.post-18555683209405496092015-12-03T11:59:42.789-05:002015-12-03T11:59:42.789-05:00Excellent post and a very familiar story. I had a ...Excellent post and a very familiar story. I had a similar "break" last year and have been slooowly getting better (also with SSRIs) ever since. I've had two first-author publications (and more as co), but am still not at the pace I once was. I try to tell myself that this is okay, but my adviser -- as generous and understanding as he has been -- happened to say during a recent meeting that "it's been plenty of time" and I "should be better by now". That was discouraging, to say the least.<br /><br />I also really want to thank the commenter Mia, above: thank you so very much for posting your daily routine!! It's very similar to mine, but I keep having that nagging voice in my head saying how I'm not working nearly enough. Plus the occasional comment from others that I'm "slacking" now. I agree: if I feel better with a more relaxed schedule and improve the quality of my work, my 9-5 routine shouldn't matter. I feel better reading your comment, thank you!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6374266320411149509.post-34976457749882376842015-12-03T11:23:19.270-05:002015-12-03T11:23:19.270-05:00"*Set limits*. Your research, you decide. &qu..."*Set limits*. Your research, you decide. "<br />As long as one's advisor is ok with that ... <br /><br />Also going to work at noon can result in a very nasty response in my lab from students and profs alike.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6374266320411149509.post-25107980049511494092015-12-02T18:58:53.137-05:002015-12-02T18:58:53.137-05:00i ended up taking 4 years between my viva and fina...i ended up taking 4 years between my viva and finally submitting minor corrections (just recently completed), after a years-long build-up of ignored mental health issues. i'm a far happier person now but i do worry that the very large gap in my academic timeline will cause issues with regard to progressing with my career.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6374266320411149509.post-7328927905523383882015-12-02T17:44:26.203-05:002015-12-02T17:44:26.203-05:00I recognize your story so much. I had the same whe...I recognize your story so much. I had the same when I was doing my master thesis and had the most uninteresting results. I felt terrible (arrythmia, anxiety, nervousness) and had a deep depression. Long hours, long days...and it did not lead to anything but disappointment. It took me 3 times as long to finish the master thesis as was originally intended. People whispered behind my back "whats wrong with that girl?".<br /><br />Against all odds to be admitted with terrible recommendations, I decided to go for a 5-years PhD. The reason was that I really wanted to understand the phenomenology of the lovely objects I worked with. I had failed so far. This time I decided only to do what I myself am interested in.<br /><br />Three full years have passed and this is my average work day:<br /><br />-i go up at 9 am and do my hobbies in the morning.<br />-at 12 i go to work. it starts with a 1 hour lunch.<br />-then I work with what i feel is most interesting this day. It often includes another <br />45 minutes of coffee drinking, and some emailing.<br />-at 6 pm i go home and eat (and prepare) a nice dinner.<br />-then i spend the evening watching crappy movies or talking to friends or doing some other hobbies, like responding to this blog :)<br /><br />One may think that this could lead to disaster. But no -- I feel relaxed, <br />enjoying the PhD entirely. Not anxious anymore, calm, relaxed, always having time for things I like. And so far I've been very lucky with publications...so far.<br /><br />With this, I learned the following lessons:<br /><br />(1) *Set limits*. Your research, you decide. If people don't agree with you, just let them drop out of the coauthor list. After all, you know better what you are doing than somebody you discuss your work with. Be aware of that some people (often guys) want to impose their ideas on younger women and try to convince you into that you are wrong and they are right. So ignore useless comments.<br /><br />(2) There is no obligation to anything or anybody. There is nobody to please. Beware of the "good girl"-syndrome and avoid it at all costs. Your obligation is to have fun and enjoy the research itself to the maximum. "What do I want to find out today?"<br /><br />(3) Do varied activities that stimulate different parts of the brain every day.<br /><br />(4) Don't do research to impress. Do research to find out the answer to the question you mostly want to know.<br /><br />(5) Failure is no failure.<br /><br />(6) Avoid all duties.<br /><br />Many hugs and keep up the good job!Mianoreply@blogger.com